Tag Archives for " parasites "

Nov 23

6 Months of Struggle

Home GymI’m the type of person who keeps things to himself. That’s how I’ve always been. When I am struggling with something, I like to battle it internally. It’s even hard for me to talk about it with my family and friends because I don’t like to show any weakness. I accept what’s going on and just flat out figure out a way to deal with it. That’s been my process forever, and it’s worked. I don’t like to seem like I’m complaining, especially on social media, so I do everything I can to post positive things that are going on. I do that because there are so many people who need that positivity in a mostly negative world. But here I am, I guess broken down, and feel the need to open up and blog about this awful journey I’ve been on for the past 6 months. I’m going to treat this like a journal until I am healed, and I’m going to do that so that I can open up about what I’m going through, giving me some sort of peace of mind, but also so that maybe sometime in the future my journey will be able to help someone out who is going through the same thing. Here it goes.

Today, as I’m writing this, my head hurts, my neck has pain all throughout it, I can’t catch my breath, I’m extremely exhausted, and I’m dizzy. These same symptoms and more have been showing up in a vicious cycle for the past 6 months. It all started with a trip to Cancun. Even now, though, I still have no idea if that trip has anything to do with the issues I’m facing, but the timing of it all is suspect. Here’s my theory, along with a few doctors of mine as well. I went to Cancun, picked up parasites that compromised my immune system, and therefore let out something that has laid dormant inside of me for years. That “something” has wreaked havoc on my health. However, I have absolutely no idea what that “something” is. All I know is that I’m beaten down mentally and physically from it. I’ve gone 6 months of feeling extremely sick and am left with a feeling of helplessness because I’ve been to 8 doctors with practically no answers as to why I’m feeling this way. Most of the doctors had absolutely no clue at all what was going on, and my family doctor that I’ve had for years believes I am nuts. Yes, that’s right, the guy that I’ve been going to since I was about 8 years old asked me during our last appointment if I thought I was going crazy, and no, he was not joking. So where has that left me? Doing research, lots and lots of research. If doctors won’t take me seriously, then I have to take matters into my own hands.

I have a lead. All of my symptoms, the reoccurrence of them, point in the direction of Lyme Disease. I’ve decided to seek out the help from a Lyme specialist here locally, and after one appointment of me explaining all of my symptoms, he looked at me and said, “You have Lyme.” That was the clinical diagnosis, and now I’m waiting on hearing back from all the testing I just got done that will verify that diagnosis. You know it’s bad when you look forward to hearing that “yes, the tests show you have Lyme Disease” phrase come out of your doctor’s mouth. It’s grim, absolutely, but when you go through months and months of terrible symptoms, of feeling like crap, of not being able to work out, work, and function normally, without knowing what is even wrong with you, just to know what the problem is creates light at the end of the tunnel. When you know the problem, you can create a solution. Right now I have no solution. The only thing I’ve been doing is preparing myself mentally for whatever treatment I have to go through for whatever problem I have. I’ve accepted that it’s going to be a tough journey, no matter the diagnosis, but I’m more than ready to do what I have to do to get my life back.

Now I want to open up about exactly what I’ve been going through. First, all of these symptoms, as I stated above, keep coming and going in cycles. At first, it was about 3 weeks of feeling like crap, and then one week of feeling pretty decent, but recently, that’s shifted to about 3 weeks of feeling decent and 1 week of feeling like crap. Right now I’m in the “feel like crap” stage. Here is a list of the symptoms that I’ve been having.

  • Breathing issues/shortness of breath/can’t catch a deep breath
  • Neck pain that moves around
  • Stiff neck
  • Pain in the back of my head/headaches/sharp pains through head
  • Extreme exhaustion
  • Stomach pain
  • Nausea
  • Groin pain
  • Brain fog
  • Slurred speech (Yeah, this was scary, but has gotten much better over the past few months)
  • Memory issues
  • Extreme dizziness/wooziness
  • Sleeping problems
  • Waking up totally exhausted
  • Anxiety and panic attacks (Not normal, I have never experienced this before, but has gotten much better over the past 3 months)
  • Uncontrollable mood swings (Again, not normal)
  • Ringing in the ears
  • Sensitivity to sound

It’s frustrating that some of my doctors won’t pay attention to anything I’m telling them. All of these symptoms I just listed are not normal for me. In fact, I’m an extremely healthy individual that works out daily and eats the right kinds of foods. Hell, my life revolves around fitness, as I own my own fitness business, where I help others make a positive change in their health. I know when something is wrong with my body, and there is most definitely something wrong. That’s part of the frustrating thing about it, that I work so hard to take care of myself, but here I am, dealing with a health issue that seems to be completely out of my control. It doesn’t matter how healthy I eat, how much I work out, this health issue still plagues me, and I’m so drained from it. I’ve learned how to deal with it, yes, and do my best not to think about it, but I simply cannot ignore it.

And then there’s the business side of it. I have a team of more than 15,000 people that I lead, and right now I don’t feel like the greatest of leaders. It’s beyond frustrating not being able to hold phone calls like I used to, to create videos like I used to, to hold trainings like I used to. I’m going to be real here, and I feel like I have let my team down. Now they won’t say that I have, but I feel like I have. It’s real tough for me to swallow. I feel guilty for not being able to give them 100% right now. I can’t give my all to them, I just can’t right now, no matter how much I want to and how hard I try. It’s just not possible. For one, I have been spending countless hours trying to figure this out, and two, I just flat out feel sick and tired. Fortunately I have incredible leaders on my team who have been helping out greatly, but the whole reason why I’m doing this business is to pay it forward, to help others achieve what I’ve been able to achieve, and I’m so frustrated that I can’t do that like I want to. But I will be back, I have to be. I truly believe that I have been put in the position I’m in for a reason, and I know I’m not done yet. It may take some time, but I will be the leader I’m supposed to be again.

I’m tired. Seriously, I’m so tired of dealing with this. I’ve been through a lot of stuff in my life, but I have never dealt with anything as challenging as this. When you wake up every single morning feeling sick after praying for some miracle that you will wake up feeling normal is hard to deal with. But my life to this point has prepared me to deal with this. I’m a strong individual and have been doing my best to stay strong throughout this entire process. It’s challenging, but I know I can and will get through it. Years of personal development has prepared me for this. The amount of support everyone has shown me has been incredible, and it’s something that I appreciate greatly. I will continue moving forward. I will conquer this!

Aug 21

Dealing With Parasites

Josh Spencer ParasitesHere I am, 4 months after returning home from Mexico, still dealing with parasites. I’ve been trying to stay as strong as I possibly can be, especially with my posts on Facebook and my interaction with the thousands of Coaches on my team, but it would be a complete lie to say that this hasn’t been the most challenging physical and mental battle I’ve ever been through in my life. The crazy thing is that I’ve been through some rough shit before. I just try not to talk about it because I still have a responsibility to be a great father and leader, and on top of that, there are way more people out there with bigger problems than what I’m going through. I’m not a complainer, never have been and never will be. I accept what goes on in my life and just learn how to deal with it. However, I’m struggling. Why am I writing this post? I don’t know, to get it out there, to bring awareness, to possibly help others who are going through a similar situation. It’s been a tough journey, and I’m going to let you all in on just how tough it’s been.

I sat down with my dad last night at Starbucks and said to him, “Dad, thank God I’m strong because I can’t imagine not being strong and going through what I’m going through.” So what am I going through? Yeah, you know I’m dealing with parasites, I’ve made that clear, but what exactly are the symptoms of these parasites? Be ready for a long list.

My Symptoms of Parasites

  • Brain fog
  • Random anxiety and panic attacks
  • Neck aches and stiffness
  • Muscle aches
  • Extreme fatigue
  • Breathing issues
  • Dizziness
  • Bloating
  • Nausea
  • Flu-like symptoms (from the die-off)
  • Emotional roller-coaster
  • Back pain

I don’t want to take time going through and explaining these symptoms right now because I already did so in my “Do I Have Parasites?” post, but I do want to pick up where that post left off. So where did it leave off? I was finishing up my second round of the Dr. Clark Para-cleanse. Things slowly started getting better and the symptoms began to disappear, but then out of nowhere came back again. For 5 days straight I experienced extreme dizziness, the worst I experienced yet, and then most of the other symptoms came back. For days I felt extremely sick, and then the breathing issues became very bad, so bad that I decided to go to the E.R. The only reason I went, though, was because Melinda (my wife) was scared and wanted me to, so I did. The E.R. docs were clueless and thought I was nuts. The main doctor kept telling me how rare it was to pick up parasites like that. Well NO SHIT it’s rare doc, but that’s what’s going on with me! He didn’t think so, but I convinced him to give me a prescription for a parasite killing medicine called Alinia. Alinia is  what my Chiropractic Kinesiologist who has dealt with parasites many times in patients recommended for me (after the natural approach, of course). I went through a 3-day treatment and again slowly began feeling better.

Everything began to improve from that point on, and I was feeling about 80%, the best I’ve felt in a LONG TIME, and then I made the mistake of getting a deep massage. It released an incredible amount of toxins stored in my muscles back into my system and I woke up the next day feeling extremely sick again. Every single one of the symptoms came back, including the brain fog, dizziness, fatigue, and breathing issues. They slowly began to disappear, but then the symptoms slowly began coming back again. It’s a terrible cycle. Then the day after I got my 4th colonics treatment, I “discovered” another large parasite. Yeah, it’s that in the picture below, and I apologize because it’s damn gross, but now you know what to look for. Before finding this, though, I was seriously beginning to question whether I still had parasites or if something else was wrong with me, and finding the parasite gave me a strange peace of mind because I now had an answer to my continued issues. That was last week, and I got back to about 90% feeling better after it passed, ALMOST feeling like myself again, but decided that I needed to go through another round of Alinia treatment, just in case there were more still left. And that’s where I am now. I just finished up the last day of the treatment and to be honest with you I feel like shit. Apparently there were parasites still living in me and now I’m experiencing the normal parasite die-off symptoms. I’m praying to God that this is the last time I have to experience symptoms, but if it’s not, I’ll just have to figure it out.

Dealing with Parasites

Now I want to talk about the mental battle that I’ve been going through with this. Like I said above, it’s been one of the toughest times, if not the toughest, in my entire life. When you start experiencing random anxiety, panic attacks, and brain fog, it’s very easy to go crazy because you have no idea what is going on with your body. On top of that, the parasites mess with your emotions. One moment I will feel happy, great, and then 5 minutes later I feel sad and depressed. Then thoughts like, “Am I always going to feel this way?” begin to creep in, leading to more anxiety. It’s a vicious, vicious cycle and mental game. To add on top of all that, it doesn’t help that I’ve felt sick for 3 months straight. That alone is a mental challenge in itself.

How am I dealing with it? Like I said above, I’m a very strong person mentally, and I can’t imagine being someone who isn’t that strong. I understand how it can bring on depression, I really do. However, I wouldn’t let myself get to that point. I’ve been raised to be mentally strong, and I’ve read so many personal development books on positive thinking, such as “The Magic of Thinking Big,” that I know how to handle very hard situations. It’s the reason why I’ve been so successful in business and with everything else in life, because I know how to handle challenges. And this is a challenge, a major one. Is it tough to stay so strong? More than you can imagine, but I have to. There are too many people relying on me. It does help that I know what the issue is because I can keep telling myself that all of the symptoms I experience are from the parasites. I can’t imagine going through what I’m going through and NOT knowing what’s wrong. And the bad part about it is that when most people with these symptoms go to normal doctors, they all pretty much tell them they are crazy. I’ve seen the chat forums, where people have these symptoms for years and years and have no idea what’s going on with them, and then they just “deal with it” or give up searching for a solution. Hopefully if you’re one of those people, you now have one possible explanation.

Some of the other things that I do to help get through this is: (1) Pray. I believe in God and His healing power, and know that I’m going through this for a reason, even if I don’t know that reason yet. Maybe it’s to bring light on the topic of parasites, or to make me stronger, or maybe both, I don’t know. I have already learned so much from this journey, including how to deal with anxiety properly. There was a point when I had no idea what was going on with me and had to do research to learn how to deal with anxiety because the attacks were happening so frequently. The exercises I discovered and applied not only helped with my anxiety, but it has helped me in other pressure situations as well. I can now calm myself down a lot quicker than I used to be able to. The anxiety has pretty much disappeared, and that has a lot to do with the brain fog disappearing (been about a month without it), but the exercises helped as well. I can’t find the original article that helped me, but I found one that’s pretty close to it. So if you struggle with anxiety, here are some anxiety exercises to help you feel better. (2) Talk to others about it. I’m thankful for Melinda and my parents because they are the ones I can really open up to about this struggle. When I’m having a rough day, just being able to talk through it makes me feel much better. The absolute worst thing you can do is keep it to yourself. If you are going through this and have nobody to talk to, don’t be afraid to message me on my Josh Spencer Fitness page on Facebook.

So that’s where I’m at. It’s been a struggle, but I’m pushing through it one day at a time. I miss working out, I miss eating somewhat normal (not chicken, brown rice, eggs, and veggies all day long), I miss having a few beers with my buddies, but I’m willing to do whatever I have to do to get myself back to feeling 100% again. If you think you might be dealing with parasites and have any questions, you can contact me on Facebook or email me at coachspence8@yahoo.com.